Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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