All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
