hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
