I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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