KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
