And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
