You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize