I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize