I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
