and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
People Share What It’s Really Like to Date Long Distance
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
These Little Things Make People Overly Angry
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him