Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
