Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
