He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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