he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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