listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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