awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
