my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize