Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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