I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
