I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
