its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
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Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs sedatives and a leash
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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