I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
