it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
then he tried to convert me to islam
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
