i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Randomize