Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
that is very illegal...i love you.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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