dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
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