therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
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