Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate

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(231): View more from Michigan

I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.

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(269): View more from Michigan

i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career

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(716): View more from New York

One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.

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(418): View more from Quebec

You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this

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(727): View more from Florida

My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."

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(314): View more from Missouri

I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.

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