Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
