you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I won't apologize to a one balled man
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
