No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
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The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
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ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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