Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize