Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
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