Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad http://tfl.nu/podg
  Replies (3) Good night (1380) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you http://tfl.nu/ee4s
  Replies (11) Good night (1519) Bad night (2893)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns? http://tfl.nu/gvvk
  Replies (51) Good night (3178) Bad night (1442)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person http://tfl.nu/h7ls
  Replies (13) Good night (1047) Bad night (2434)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard. http://tfl.nu/ztg2
  Replies (18) Good night (1198) Bad night (3322)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!! http://tfl.nu/co2h
  Replies (28) Good night (5536) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here. http://tfl.nu/9um1
  Replies (10) Good night (1593) Bad night (3346)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on http://tfl.nu/0k8v
  Replies (26) Good night (3059) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle. http://tfl.nu/kelj
  Replies (33) Good night (4846) Bad night (1115)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy? http://tfl.nu/p3a3
  Replies (9) Good night (4026) Bad night (1024)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u http://tfl.nu/jall
  Replies (21) Good night (4180) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja http://tfl.nu/0h0h
  Replies (9) Good night (5177) Bad night (860)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet http://tfl.nu/9wvg
  Replies (3) Good night (4023) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you. (270): No, that's okay. Don't worry about it. (618): Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway. http://tfl.nu/gcov
  Replies (45) Good night (3594) Bad night (1278)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related http://tfl.nu/atsx
  Replies (2) Good night (661) Bad night (385)

Randomize