its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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