She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂