yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
try to milk me bitch
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
