It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize