I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize