so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
