So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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