This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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