New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
