Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I wish I only lived at night.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I haven't been this sober since birth.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
