How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
