first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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