The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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