Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
tell me about the fingering
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