remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
