Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
